Mommy or child?

Well, I'm home from Utah now and I've decided that even though I had a good time with my Mom and siblings and their families and I enjoyed not being in charge of the whole Thanksgiving meal for a change, I would much rather be a mom  than a child.  I missed my kids like nobody's business.  I had two of them there but they were intermingled with cousins so I didn't even get to sit by them.  This was an eye-opener for me.  It won't be very long before my kids are going to want to be parents more than they want to be children.  They are moving in that direction even as we speak.  Such a bittersweet feeling.  I love them so much that I want them to experience that kind of love for their own children but on the other hand, if they move on to that phase of their lives then where does that leave me?  I'm already having a terrible time getting into the Christmas spirit.  I don't have the same excitement while decorating my house and I'm not getting the same joy even looking at it almost done.  I do it for them and they aren't here to enjoy it.  Buying them gifts is also feeling a little awkward because I feel like some of the things I am getting them are probably things that wives would like to get them.  I think I will start some new and different traditions next year to adjust to my new role.  Just writing that makes me feel a little better.  Since I can't stop them from growing up then I will just have to adjust and become the best mother-in-law and grandma I can be.  I am now committed to making this a very Merry Christmas - one way or another:)